Another tip from John:

Photo courtesy of Amanda Pair Photography

Unless you are trained ballroom dancers, then the choregraphed first dance is for the audience, not for the bride and groom.  The first dance should be a time that you as a very new couple can look back on the day and talk about it.  Look around the room and see your reception and anticipate the evening.  

It is not a time to be counting, one, two, three, four.  One, two, three, four.  You wonder how we know that you are counting?  We can read it on your lips in the video.  We can see that you are not caught up in the magical moment of the first dance, but you are trying not to fall down or trip.  

The traditional sway, aka the middle school sway, is a classic for a reason.  Anyone can do it.  And we can get better footage because you are spending your time looking into your husband's/wife's eyes.  You only get one first dance, fill it with romance.

Meredith Ryncarz Photography

Everyone knows that they are going to be nervous on their wedding day.  Standing in front of 100s of people trying to repeat the words that the minister is asking you to do, without embarrassing yourself, is very nerve racking.  And I am not trying to add something to your list of things to do, but it is actually something that you can take care of before the wedding day.

When you guys sit down with your pastor, ask him/her to include in the vows and ring ceremony for you both to face each other first.  Let me try to explain.  Because this seems like an easy one - the natural way is to turn to someone when you are speaking to them, but when you are up there and the minister is feeding you your "lines" you start talking to him and forget to turn to your spouse-to-be.  Most of the time there is this awkward wanting to talk to your spouse, but you are looking at the minister for the next line.  All the while we are getting video of the back of your head (because let's remember the church's restrictions on camera placement) instead of your faces.  Same goes with the rings.  We want you to turn out so that the audience can see what you are doing.  

The perfect, easy solution is coming up!  We have heard this done many times and it sounds very natural.  This is what the minister should say,  "Now Suzy, face Billy and repeat after me."  Easy as that! It works perfectly and your photographer and videographer will get great shots of your face as you say the most sacred of vows.  Trust me on this one.  

Are we there yet?

This is a pretty simple tip that I am sure most of you can figure out why it is important.  If you are hiring a shuttle service for your guests and bridal party, please make sure that the driver is actually from the area of your wedding, not the area that you might be planning the wedding from.  

Photo courtesy of David Boyd Photography

The driver asking directions from the guests is "ok" early on in the day, but after everyone has had a cocktail or two, then it is not that effective.  The driver should really know where he is going.  And remember, this actually happened at a destination wedding one time.  Ugh.

Practice the cake cutting.  Cut, cut, stab (as I like to call it).

Many years ago we had a couple that was cutting the bride's cake and the groom absent-mindedly fed himself cake before feeding it to his new bride.  It was pretty funny then (and now)!  If you want to see a clip of it, here it is.  Please keep in mind that it is just raw footage so it won't be the masterpiece you are expecting from us!!!  And really do yourself a favor and skip to :45 into the clip.  

Funny Cake Cutting Segment from Falls-Wilkes Wedding by Main Street Productions

We understand that you don't cut this sort of cake every day and it is kind of weird to have to cut it with your hand here and his hand there and wait for the photographer to take the picture.  BUT IT IS JUST CAKE; JUST CUT IT HOW YOU WANT!!!  Guys, please do keep in mind that your bride's mouth might not be as big as yours and don't feed her a bite that you would take, but maybe half of the size.  

No one ever knows how to cut the cake without instruction, which is fine.  Just wait until your instructors have moved away until you start cutting the cake.  That way your pictures and video won't have half of the serving staff in them. 

Here is an instructional article that we found that may provide some assistance before the wedding.  

Photo courtesy of Daniel Taylor Photography

Many times brides are lucky enough to carry a special handkerchief from their grandmother or great aunt or some loved family member.  It is often their "something old."  Brides normally carry it with their bouquet of flowers.  

Recently we saw the bride give it to her groom to put it in his pocket.  This is a great idea for two reasons.  One it doesn't get ruined if the flower stems rub and stain the delicate handkerchief.  And secondly, it is very sweet that the groom offer his bride a cloth if she starts crying during the ceremony!  

What a neat idea!

Photo courtesy of J.Woodbery Photography

This latest tip came from an actual conversation that I overheard a couple of years ago.  The mother of the bride was talking to a guest about how crazy her morning had been. The weather was terrible and they had a million things to do before coming to the church. Would you like to guess what happened?

She gets in her car to zoom off to the church with the daughter, the bride, and she doesn't have any gas.  So nervous and excited bride + crazy busy mom + gas station = NO FUN!  

So my advice is anticipate all of the trips back and forth to the church for the rehearsal or dropping off dresses and fill up your car on Thursday before the wedding.  You will thank me later!

Can you hear me now?

Photo courtesy of Unplugged Photography

This week's tip is from John, so it will be short and sweet and not too wordy.  Give your cell phone to a bridesmaid early in the am of your wedding day.  I would hope that if someone NEEDED to get a hold of you, then they would first try someone else.  But you don't need to deal with having to answer the phone and give directions or times while you are getting your hair done or putting your dress on.  

An idea from the lovely ladies with Engaged, A Wedding Library said maybe even record a cute message saying you are in the process of becoming the NEW Mrs. ______ and give them another number to call.  

I would also like to add that this also applies to the mom of the bride as well.  

Several summers ago we filmed a beautiful wedding at a local church.  Everything was just perfect for the day.  During the ceremony, one of the mics that was on a soloist went out right before he was about to sing.  When a mic goes bad, it doesn't just stop working, it transmits this awful sounding static that is heard by everyone in the church.  

Photo courtesy of David Boyd Photography 

I guess these things happen. The problem was that as soon as it started, we looked over to the sound board for the operator to fix the problem on the board and no one was there.  Yikes!  The sound board was turned on by the church, but they didn't have anyone to operate it.  I don't know if this is normal policy for lots of churches, but come on, the ceremony is under 45 minutes usually, can't the church pay someone to be there!!!!! 

If someone had been working, they could have had the ability to fix the mic problem or if nothing else, pull his mic altogether.  Because trust me, this guy could have carried the entire church without using a mic!  To make it worse, people were looking at us to fix the problem, but we couldn't.  It wasn't our sound board, and we are running cameras.  Needless to say, for the final edit, we tried and tried to minimize the static on the video, and we made HUGE improvements, but you could still hear it.  Thankfully the wonderful bride and her family didn't let it ruin the day. (This beautiful photo below was not from the wedding in question.)

Moral of the story, make sure that the church not only has a sound board, but also an operator for your wedding.  

Another great tip from Cathy Kelly at The White Room.  Whoever is helping the bride put her dress on, MUST NOT be wearing colored nail polish.  Clear or a french manicure is acceptable.  Otherwise you can get streaks of color onto the white dress!  Yikes!  Can you imagine getting ready for pictures on your wedding day and your mom's freshly painted nails scrape against your dress?  The next thing you know, you are trying to find something to get the streak of nail polish off the back of the dress.  Remember this does apply for bridal sessions too!  

Photo courtesy of Simple-color.com

Crochet hooks are a must if you have a million buttons on the back of your dress!  It will save hours!  Not really, but it seems that way!  And maybe Wal-Mart has a two pack because I personally think it is a good idea to pack an extra in your overnight bag for your honeymoon night.  Not only will your groom not be a big fan of having to undo 25 little tiny hooks, but I also doubt that he will be very patient in this process.  

We have clients that chose for the wedding planner or a mom to unhook the little buttons (leaving the zipper untouched) before leaving the reception.  By that point in the evening, no one will ever notice that you have the hooks unhooked.  It is just unnecessary stress for your groom to have to deal with it.  

"He said, she said."

I don't read all of the traditional wedding blogs with tips and checklists and all of that.  I read it when I was planning our wedding, but really not since, so I hope you won't find any similarities.  The point of the Insider's Tips is to try to post things that you might not have heard of/thought of/seen before.  

With all of that said, my next tip might be one that you have heard about before.  But it is really important, so I wanted to post it.  

I think we have established that it is hard to pick out vendors for your wedding.  You don't know who to trust or who will do a good job.  If you have a friend that has recently gotten married, then she is a great resource.  But don't overlook the great resource that one of your already booked vendors can be.  

Now of course, I love receiving referrals.  A very large portion of our business comes from referrals, so I don't take this lightly.  But I really love giving referrals to brides.  After all, this is our world.  We work with a whole lot of people - we know the quality professionals to refer you to.  Anyone can spend a million dollars on advertising claiming to be the best whatever, but just because you have money, it doesn't mean that you care about your work or your clients.  Double check with a few of your wedding vendors to see who they can recommend.  

Photo courtesy of Stacy Richardson Photography - gorgeous bouquet by HotHouse Design Studio

You'll poke your eye out!

You would think that I have learned my lesson after posting a controversial topic on here (seeing each other before), but no.  I just don't really know what to think about this trend of throwing lavender at the bride and groom when leaving the reception.  The times that we have seen this done, it seems to clump and then acts as a weapon against the couple.  John says that the humidity in the South aids in the "clumpiness."  Everyone is also immersed in a cloud of lavender after the couple runs through.  It might smell wonderful in small doses, but when 3 gallons of it is throw at your head, you might think otherwise. It does make for a great photo...

I like the glow stick idea, where it doesn't matter about the amount of alcohol you did or did not consume, no one gets hurt.   

Photo courtesy of Simple Color Photography

X marks the Spot!

Ok loyal readers, you better really enjoy these titles!  I think that they are hilarious and I try to keep coming up with great ones each week!!!

This tip is actually one that I heard early in 2010 at a local ABC meeting where Cathy Kelly from the White Room was speaking.  I can't remember all of the tips she gave that night; they were so many wonderful ideas to take back.  But this week is to help brides to keep their wedding dress clean the day of (and really during your bridal session too).  

Photo courtesy of Allison Lewis Photography - Regions Field

Take a white bed sheet, place it on the floor and cut an X in it.  When it comes time for the photo session, lay the sheet down on the ground/floor and step on the X.  Now grab the corners of the sheet and pull them up to you.  Walk where you need to go.   When you get to the site of the picture, just place the sheet down and have someone hide it under your dress.  You are able to surround your wedding dress with a protective covering.  Viola!  

Some of the best footage for us comes from when the bride is willing to go the distance to get some really great shots, for example, in the woods at the Sonnet House or through a dandelion patch.   With the sheet surrounding the dress, you don't have to worry about getting it dirty AND you still get those amazing shots! 

Is this thing on?

Not only is my next tip one that can help you, as the bride, but it also makes our life easier too!  It's a win-win!

Here in the South, the majority of the toasts are done the day before the wedding at the rehearsal dinner.  Not only do you need to hire a professional to capture those priceless moments, but please also ask you venue for a mic stand.  

It will require your guests who are giving a toast to come up to the front of the room where everyone can see them.  (And maybe even stand in the lighted part of the room.) For your videographer, this helps tremendously!!  If you don't have a mic stand, people think that they can just stand up at their table and speak loud enough for people to see/hear them, while we are trying to get a camera focused on them from across the room.  

We are also able to plug our audio recording devices into the mic so that we get crystal clear audio on that special toast when your "never cries EVER" dad, tells you and everyone how proud he is of you, and how he couldn't have asked for a better guy than your fiancé.  Those are the priceless moments that we capture at the rehearsal dinner.

The video clip below starts with very compelling audio from the rehearsal dinner.  We are so glad that they hired us to film it AND used a professional mic setup. 

Practice makes perfect.

Photo courtesy of David Boyd Photography

Tradition has a lot to do with what is done at a wedding.  Interlocking the arms and drinking from the champagne flutes is a picture that everyone wants.  But it is the most awkward position to be in.  And it doesn't work if the bride and groom are more than 4 inches different in height, trust me.

But they say practice makes perfect, so spend an evening practicing.  Maybe even get out that old game of Twister to try to make it work!  No really, just remember that the goal is to drink out of your own glass.  Gracefully, please, if you don't mind.   And if it doesn't work, then you spent your whole evening drinking wine or champagne.  Darn!  

I like the newer tradition of just holding the glasses out in front of you and having the picture made then. Less trouble.  Same effect.  

Clean up on Aisle 1!

We haven't seen this as much as of late, but please, if you are going to have an aisle runner, teach the guys how to pull it correctly.  It never fails, they don't know how to work it and they spend 10 uncomfortable minutes trying to get the sides to work at the same time for it to unroll.  And your guests just sit and watch.  Either have it already placed on the floor or just get rid of it altogether.  

Photo courtesy of Simple Color Photography

Hey you, turn around!  I  can't see!

I thought I would post one of John's tips.  He likes to add his two cents every so often. I am not sure how I feel about, "Hey, you, turn around!  I can't see!"  I don't mind it, it works well for video and the audience, but it might be too untraditional for me to start a revolution about it.  Maybe I will just be pleasantly surprised when it happens.

We have had several couples turn toward the audience, with the officiant standing between them and the audience.  You are able to see their faces more and you don't spend 35 minutes staring at the back of the bride's dress.  So sure it has its advantages and we have seen it grow in popularity in the past year - just something to think about. What do you think about it?

Fill 'er up!

Photo courtesy of Simple Color Photography

We have already established that I am not the most traditional gal.  I appreciate tradition, especially when it comes to weddings, but sometimes I don't think you have to follow it all of the time.  Take for instance my next tip, Fill 'er up.  

Sometimes you have a bride that is from the city in which the wedding is taking place, and the groom is not.  When this occurs, you tend to have more people to come and want to sit on the "bride's side" at the church.  So the ushers fill up the entire left side with her friends/family.  But on the "groom's side", you don't have near as many people.  So it looks lopsided.  Even though it shouldn't matter, I wonder if it ever makes the parents of the less attended side feel bad. 

My solution?  Have your ushers seat the guests evenly.  Some people will still want to sit on the traditional side, but for those who don't care, use them to even it out.  I know for video, it will look better.  I love how this trend has become more popular in recent years.  

Who’s your master?

Photo courtesy of Unplugged Photography

The other month, I attended a meeting of local bridal consultants.  At this meeting, a DJ was speaking to the planners about certain issues that arise at a wedding on the entertainment side.  He brought up some concerns that I have never thought about, so I am bringing them to you, in case it has slipped your mind as well.  (Please note:  As always, if you hire a professional wedding planner, they will know all of these tips, so you won’t have to.)

If you hire a band for your wedding, you will need a master of ceremony of sorts.  Some bands don’t mind announcing your bridal party’s entrance, or directing your guests to the cake cutting.  But what if your band is one of those that only plays music and refuses to make any announcements.  Who will be left to hold the microphone?

Professional DJs already have the ability to take the reigns at the reception.  They do it all of the time.  They are there to help with the flow of the reception or take instruction from the wedding planner on the timeline, as well as get everyone on the dance floor.  They also can play the music during the band’s break time, so that your dance floor is always hoppin’.  And unlike your Aunt Sally, have experience talking on a microphone and not (hopefully) sounding silly.

We have an example from the beginning of this year.  Amazing wedding, planner, band, videographer, everything, but several days before the wedding, it was realized that the band would not be in charge of announcements at the reception.  Although there was a planner involved, she had more important things to attend to, so she was not going to be able to take the mic.  Thankfully, the couple had rented a photo booth (brought it by a local DJ who happens to be a Master of Ceremony), and he was able to step in and make all of the announcements for the evening.   He was able to sound knowledgeable and professional, which was appreciated by the bride and groom and their families.

Another example actually happened again this past weekend. The venue had arranged that during the band's breaks that we would do the major events of the reception (cake cutting, bouquet and garter, etc). Well the band was on a break, so they were not going to be around to count the toss down or ask for the single ladies. The venue planner didn't want to talk into the microphone, we were working, so after a few polite requests, one of the band members agreed to skip his break and help with the mic.

Bands and DJs can work in conjunction with each other nicely.  I am not saying you shouldn’t hire your favorite band just because they refuse to be in charge of the announcements, but be aware.

Photo Courtesy of Simple Color

How much for the bride?

Remember to take the barcode stickers off the bottom of your new toasting glasses.  I would have never thought about this one, but I saw it the other day in our raw footage!  No, it doesn’t ruin the day if you forget, but you might get a picture of it!

Tape it down!

Photo courtesy of Allison Lewis Photography

You can have the most beautiful bride, bridesmaid, whoever on the wedding day, in a fabulous strapless dress, the perfect shot set up with the sun giving a nice sunburst on your lens, a little wind rustling the trees, and what happens?  The girl hikes her dress up (to keep the chest area from getting too low).  Shot ruined.

The popularity of strapless dresses for both a wedding dress and/or bridesmaid dress has grown tremendously over the last several years.  And I agree, they are beautiful!  But please use some sticky dress tape and secure the dress to your body.  Now you won't have to spend all day adjusting yourself.  Less hassle for you, better shots for us!  

In case you would like to rush out right now and buy some sticky tape for your dress, here is a link!  http://www.amazon.com/Hollywood-Fashion-Tape-Wedding-Apparel/dp/B000H3WNXM